The Light Behind Your Eyes
by ClaireBear1982
Summary: A songfic based off of MCR's The Light Behind Your Eyes. Remus is playing messenger on Severus' behalf. Not that it does him much good. Major characters deaths


"Lupin, can I have a word?" asked Severus coolly as the Order meeting broke up.

Remus sighed, he knew exactly what Severus wanted to talk to him about.

"Severus, what can I do for you?" asked Remus wearily. The full moon was fast approaching and he was starting to feel the effects already.

Once the room had cleared, Severus spoke.

"How is Lily?" asked Severus urgently.

"She, James, and Harry are doing fine."

Severus grimaced over the latter names.

"Pass this along," asked Severus as he produced a beige envelope seemingly out of nowhere.

Remus sighed an inaudible sigh. Lily wouldn't be happy, but out of politeness Remus took the envelope and watched as Severus stalk away in his usual bat like manner. For a moment Remus considered setting the letter aflame, but sighed again and shoved it in his robes pocket and headed to the Apparition point.

A couple of days later, Remus went to Godric's Hollow to see Lily and James. As Lily opened the door to Remus, she looked grim. Remus' heart began to race, he knew that look only too well.

"Lily, what is it? What's wrong?" asked Remus quietly as she quickly shut the front door.

"Dumbledore just left, Benji was killed last night. James is raging, and I feel sick," said Lily as tears welled up in her muted green eyes.

Remus pulled her into a hug, Severus' letter forgotten about. That evening the three young people raised a glass of firewhiskey to Benji and quietly started mourning another compadre whose light behind their eyes had been snuffed out.

In the coming weeks things just got worse and worse for the Order. More and more of their members were losing their lives, and the Longbottoms were suffering a fate worse than death - they'd both been tortured into insanity by the Lestrange's and Crouch Jr.

Another Order meeting, and Severus again collared Remus about the letter.

"Is there any reply from Lily?" asked Severus shortly.

For a moment Remus was confused. Reply? What reply? Then it hit him, he still hadn't given Lily, Severus' letter. Knowing that he couldn't lie to Severus, Remus opted for truth.

"No, not yet. The last time I was there was the day after Benji died, and I feared if I gave Lily your letter she would either tear it up or burn it."

"Just don't forget," sneered Severus before sweeping away.

Remus rolled his eyes, and headed to the Apparition point and headed to James and Lily's to give them an update as neither could attend meetings anymore. When he got there he found Sirius had preceded him.

"Hey Moony, so what did Snivellus want with you?" asked Sirius imperiously.

"Not a lot, why?" lied Remus. He wasn't ready to declare that Severus had been asking after Lily.

Both Lily and Sirius raised an eyebrow at their friend. Lily knew full well that Remus was lying, and she planned to find out why. As for Sirius, he too had plans on getting it out of Remus when they were alone. Just then a diversion happened in the form of James and Harry, and Remus breathed a sigh of silent relief.

An hour later and Lily collared Remus as he came back from the kitchen with a glass of water for Sirius.

"Remus, what's going on? Why is Sev wanting to talk to you alone? Don't lie to me, don't sugar-coat it either, just give it to me," whispered Lily fiercely.

Silently Remus pulled an envelope from his pocket and handed it to her before leaving her to open it privately.

Lily just stared at the envelope in her hand. She was torn between tearing it up, and wanting to read it; just to see her former friends handwriting. Heading to the kitchen, Lily pulled the back door open and sat on the doorstep and tore the envelope open.

_Lily, _

_I know I am the last person you want to hear from right now, but I had to say that I am so sorry for everything. I wish to Merlin I could take it all back, but I can't, it's too late. _

_So instead I want to say: be strong, time comes for all of us, I will say goodbye now, and I'm sorry it will end this way, at some point we'll lose this fight. Promise me that you won't cry for me, I'm not worth it. Never let them take the light behind your eyes, live, love, sing in the rain like you used to as a child. _

_Goodbye old friend, _

_Sev. _

Lily felt her heart turn over and tears fill her eyes. What did it mean? Was this a clever concealed message, did Voldemort know where they were? Or was Severus telling her that he didn't expect to live through the war? Lily sat in numb confusion for a few moments. Composing herself, Lily tucked the letter away in a drawer for now, next time Dumbledore came to see them she would ask him what he thought of the message.

In the end, Dumbledore suggested James and Lily change their secret keeper. Of course this was the wrong thing to do. Halloween that year Voldemort arrived in Godric's Hollow and killed James and Lily.

When the news broke Severus headed straight to the West Country to the cottage where Lily had been hiding in. Upon arrival the first thing he noticed was part of the upstairs had been blown away, and the front door was wide open. Severus ran up the path and through the door and found Potter laid on his back, the light behind his eyes gone. Severus' heart started to beat a tattoo in his chest as he headed up the stairs to where the damage had been done. There on the floor he found his Lily dead on the floor, the green fire behind her eyes, gone. Severus let out a howl of pain much like that of a wounded animal, he fell to his knees and scooped Lily into his arms and sobbed.

_If I could be with you tonight_

_I would sing you to sleep_

_Never let them take the light behind your eyes_

_I failed and lost this fight_

_Never fade in the dark_

_Just remember you will always burn as bright… _


End file.
